Tucker's first week at home + 6 random mom thoughts

As I write this, it's just me and Tucker at home. It's the first time we've really been alone together since he was born nine days ago.

I have yet to migrate our things downstairs. I've eaten breakfast and lunch in bed. There are so many chores that need to be done. 

But all that's okay, because I know that these are the good old days, the days I'll look back on and long for. When he outgrows his newborn clothes. When he starts school. The first time he leaves the house by himself. 

This week has been nothing short of surreal. Our normal routines have all but disappeared, replaced by sleepless nights, two-person diaper changes and whispered conversations.

But with those adjustments have come so many sweet memories. Like hearing Tyler sing made-up songs to our fussy baby. Watching Tucker's funny expressions when he wakes up from a nap (his tiny little smiles are just the best). Taking him on his first stroll around the neighborhood. 

I wouldn't trade those moments for anything, not even a full night's sleep.

6 Random Mom Thoughts 

Some deep, some just about pee.

1. I can breathe through any pain.

I used to think I had a very low pain tolerance. And when I say very low, I mean I would pass out just getting my blood pressure taken.

So when I decided to have a natural, non-medicated labor, I wasn't sure if I was strong enough. But I was determined to make it work. (Plus, the epidural needle is huge, so I had to make it work).

Twenty-right hours later, I had done it and our sweet boy was here.

What got me through it? Learning to breath through every second of pain. I'd imagine that inhaling sucked the pain from my body and exhaling released it back into the world. I still practice this at home, as my body continues healing and as Tucker and I figure out this whole, sometimes-painful nursing thing.
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2. Love is patient and kind.

Never in my adult life have I been more dependent on another human being than I have been on Tyler this week. He's had to help me with everything, from going to the bathroom and making me food to applying lip balm a million times during labor. And he has yet to reply with the slightest sigh or exasperation. He's easily the most patient and loving person I have ever met.

3. You're so handsome.

Tyler and I say this to Tucker countless times a day. It's still crazy to look at him and know that we created him, and that despite the billions of things that could have gone wrong during his formation, he is perfect from his toes to his head.

4. Living in the moment means...

This one came to me late one night (or maybe it was early one morning). I was exhausted, Tucker was hungry and all I wanted to do was turn over and sleep uninterrupted.

In that one delirious moment, I realized that living in the moment isn't about being free or carefree; it means fighting everything that's weighing you down and being there for the person or situation that needs you most.

5. Be great, feel great, act great.

​I stole this one from my cup of tea last night, but it has inspired me to make our first day alone together a good one. Today, I'll take care of myself, take care of my son and stay positive even when his screams are at their loudest.
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6. Being a boy-mom is being okay with pee everywhere.

Tucker has peed on me three times so far. And every time, it takes me a just a little too long to realize what's happening. Before I know it, there's pee everywhere, probably in places I can't even get to or see. I am okay with that. I am okay with that. I am okay with that...